Friday, February 25, 2011

Fatherhood Friday's

This post is alternatively titled: "The dreaded public restroom with twins!"
Most of the time when I go into a public restroom I am grossed out and try to not touch anything. Well now that the boys are using the normal toilet this has been taken to a whole new level. Last week the boys and I went to the store (Jen was at home doing pictures) well I made the mistake of giving the boys some juice on the way there. Well they drank a whole cup of juice on the way there so I knew we would have to go potty while there. I got everyone into the cart and was pushing as fast as I could because I knew the potty would be calling our name any minute. Well I got about done and Joel was crying he had to go so bad. So we went to the bathroom.

Upon walking in I see the “Caution Wet Floor” sign (Not a good sign) and knew this wasn’t going to be a great experience. The floor was soaked; I don’t know if it was pee or water but either way it wasn’t real clear and smelled pretty funny. So I knew that I couldn’t touch the floor or let the boys touch it. If any of you have kids you know they are so interested in touching everything and flushing the toilet is always a good time. Well it’s not good to touch something that is covered in pee, crap and pubic hair! So I have to hold their legs up so they can miss the pee and pubic hair that is on the front of the bowl and try to dodge their pee all without falling on the floor and getting myself covered (can you picture that?) Then there is the other one over there pulling all the toilet paper out and stomping in the water/pee on the floor.

After we got done I thought, thank God we are done with that lets get the last few things and get out of here. Well we about made it back to the isle when one of the boys had to go again. I packed up a few more things and went back into the dreaded bathroom. That makes 2 times. So we get done with another great experience and try to get the heck out of there. I get the rest of the stuff and get in line. At this point the shortest line is about 5 people deep we get up and are about to start unloading our cart and guess what? POTTY POTTY POTTY!! Here we go back to the disgusting bathroom once again. That makes 3 times! Once again after a horrible experience we get back in line and get everything paid for. Well my lovely wife wanted some subway (I swear that's all she eats these days) so we went over there. The cart is full of groceries and the boys and all we want to do is get out of there. Again the line is about 3 to 4 people deep. We get within 1 person and back to dungeon (I'm sorry, bathroom) we go. That makes 4 times. Back to subway get our food and get out of there! Unloading the groceries like a superstar who just wants to get home without any more trips to the dreaded place I hear one of them say potty. This time it went in 1 ear and out the other! Next question was how fast can I get home and will everyone be dry.

We made it home with dry choo choos and had a great rest of the night. Lessons learned: don’t let kids drink so much juice when not around a clean bathroom! I hope this weeks grocery trip doesn’t have so much drama, err bathroom breaks!

Love Jon/DADA

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